If it were Christmas, this would be my Bah-Humbug note. It might be the time that you click onto the next blog- fair warning.
I am so tired of hoopla over a night of the year that happens every 365 days. We went to a party last night that was fine, good food, good conversation, and in a beautiful new house that was simply made for parties. Nobody there dressed like Big Ang. Everything was going along well, several people left at the 10 PM mark, a few more at 11, but after that everybody was morally bound by some invisible rule that they had to 'stay until the ball drops'. So of course the tv goes on and everybody gathers 'round a television to watch people in other places celebrate---what? Champagne came out, we waited, listened to inane talk from former 'stars' wearing way too much make-up, too many furs, earmuffs with suits- whatever. Myley Cyrus' tongue made repeated appearances. Time Square was jammed with idiots and drunks and normal people in town for their first time, all vying for some time on the camera, jumping up and down, making faces, behaving like they were having just so much fun that it needed to be televised. Huh?
Why do we do this- why can't a celebration be something quiet and personal? Why do we have to wait till midnight for a new number to appear on the calendar? Why do we have to pick words of intent', thoughts for spiritual guidance, share our past failures on Facebook and then show up for the 'after party' the next day?
You see, this year is the year I finally reach curmudgeonry, so I am not gonna do this stuff any more. I don't have a lot of time left on this planet and I have lots I need to do before I either get hit by the bus (unlikely in Florida) or get sent to the rest home (highly likely in Florida!). I don't think rest homes have room for my warehouse full of materials and tools for making art- I will probably get put in a room with people cutting up old greeting cards to thumbtack to the bulletin board in the hall, so I have LOTS to do before that happens- the day they take away my sharp scissors. The day that I have to call the handicap van to take me to Michaels. The day when it all becomes too overwhelming to even put on clean clothes.
So, in spite of my thoughts on resolutions and catch phrases, I have had a little mantra in the back of my brain for a few days now. I told you yesterday, and I'll tell you again today and promise to never bring it up again.
WORK MORE HARDER
Now that I can maneuver my shoulder about halfway, now that I have discovered I can knit for 30 minutes with the heating pad balanced in place, and now that I finally have a bit of time between trips up north I don't want to do, I can work! I am dropping my uneasy feeling about being at the studio all by myself on these off-days. If the robbers and murderers come, so be it. I am dropping working to deadlines any more, and I am dropping worrying about entires and shipping and packing and return mail.
I need to Work More Harder and Worry Less Harder!
So, today, just because I can, I am getting dressed in my dirty levis, heading to the studio to finish up a project I started weeks ago but lost interest in. I had a 'vision' in my half-sleep last night about a resolution to my problems with it. So I used that word, 'resolution', but in a different way- not a promise to myself or the family or the world, simply a way to fix something problematic.
No pictures, no sarcasm, just a declaration that I am going to work more, work harder, and get some things accomplished even if nobody ever knows!
I do hope you all have an easy time ahead. We all have our bad periods where nothing goes right for weeks on end. If you've been with me long while I 'wait for the Muse' you know mine, or at least the last ten years, all too well. Somehow it all blows over no matter how badly it feels while you're in it. Things always work out, maybe not as YOU intend or hope, but they do work out eventually. And life goes on, and we adapt to writing the new date on our checks, and to curmudgeon birthdays ahead.
Like Rodney Dangerfield said, "Consider the alternative!"
And as Kurt Vonnegut said, "There's only one rule that I know of, babies—God damn it, you've got to be kind.". I think that is excellent life advice, even for curmudgeons.
don't you?
2 comments :
yes, absolutely. Do what you want and let the idiots p-off. I don't think you will be truly curmudgeonly until they take away the sharp scissors. Until then do what you want. Use the good stuff and even the stuff that might not have been 'good enough'. Have fun and more fun.
I do like your blog and attitude.
Susan
I want to work more harder and I think I have to include something along the lines of "notice idiots less and don't give them the time of day" or... something. The holidays were difficult this year but a few people said the most ridiculous, stupid, innocently-ugly sort of things... I did resolve to not let them go un-noticed (as in "that's a totally ridiculous thing to say"). OK I'll focus on the work now.
My antispam non-robotic word is: 24926824 16
is that for real?
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